It is now 1 am, 11th of june. I went out just now at 10.50pm, 10th of june as at 10.40pm, I got a call from Joshua saying that he had an accident! A car crash and Faruq is not doing really well. So I went to mom's room to inform my parents that I am going to the hospital. They let me off so I quickly drive to Subang Jaya Medical Centre and..
I found Faruq's parents at the lobby as well as Joshua's. Joshua is with his cuts all over. There's a few handyplast sticking at his above eyebrow and nose. His leg is kinda injured since he can't really walk well. That's ok, but I am quiet surprised seeing Arissa's parents is there too as well as Raziq's. Hey, what's going on!
So I pulled Joshua aside and asked. He said that it wasn't only he and Faruq in the car. There's Arissa and Raziq too! Oh great damn it! I was real blanked! I do not know what to say. Joshua pulled me to the CCU's level and he showed that Raziq is in there. Then I looked at Joshua's face with 100 of question marks. I wish I could say "SO WHAT?".
Later Joshua showed me that Faruq is doing fine but he's asleep due to the medicine. Ok, fine! I am glad that Faruq is not so badly injured. Except for his broken arm. Then? What's the problem here? I was looking at everybody with nothing's in my mind!
At last, Arissa's mom told me that Arissa is having a phobia or emotional distraction due to the accident and what had happened to Raziq. I was looking right at Aunty Nia's face. I seriously don't understand. Why are they telling me this and why is that everyone is looking at me with that hopping faces? What? What did I do? or what should I do instead?
At last, Joshua came near to me and whispered, "It is only you that can comfort Arissa, and please! For our friendship sake, please do". What? I can't believe what I just heard. All of you are actually begging me to talk to Arissa? To comfort her? TO WHAT? TO WHAT THE HELL?
Hey, come on! I was her ex boyfriend, who she had dumped for that Raziq, and now Raziq is in the CCU, so I have to comfort Arissa? Hey, did you all just lost your mind? I was suffering for like years since she left me, and now.. I have to do that charity work? Is that a charity work or what?? It is not that I hold grudge on Arissa, it is not that I do not want to help her, help them at this critical moment, but come on! What should I say to Arissa? Is it like... "Hi, thanks for dumping me and oh ya! Congrats that your bf had broke his arms and legs, and..." WHAT??
Hey! What's going on? No, I am NOT doing this! I am seriously not going to get involve in this! Joshua was really begging, saying that I can motivate Arissa. Arissa refuse to consume all medications, and now she's crying on the bed and not letting anyone to see her. Uh! Hey guys, I am not a psychologist or a counselor that they can count on to ease all Arissa's sadness. I don't think that she'll ever need me. And what if I am going to fall for her again after the 2 years of working on to get rid of her? Or.. What if Raziq get well very soon, and seeing that I am next to his girlfriend's bed? Oh NO! Never!
I said to them sorry and I left. When I was driving back home, I asked myself! Am I that cruel? Am I the type of keeping grudge? Am I the type of irresponsible? Mom never taught me to be as selfish as this! But... I stopped at the side of the road. I cried. Yes I cried real bad. I am sorry Joshua, it is not that I do not want to help friends who are in trouble, it is not that I am being selfish! But... No one understands me. I called mom from the car. I cried to her and asked her, what to do? What should I do? Mom said come back home, we'll discuss. And...
I came back home few minutes ago. Mom said, I shouldn't get involve if I do not want to. Mom called Aunt Nia and they had some discussions as I called Joshua telling him my sorry. He said he understand and it is okay. Humm.. What a day! What a world!
Sorry Joshua..
Sorry Aunt Nia..
Sorry Arissa...
I just do not want to re-cut my unheal wound.
Please.
I found Faruq's parents at the lobby as well as Joshua's. Joshua is with his cuts all over. There's a few handyplast sticking at his above eyebrow and nose. His leg is kinda injured since he can't really walk well. That's ok, but I am quiet surprised seeing Arissa's parents is there too as well as Raziq's. Hey, what's going on!
So I pulled Joshua aside and asked. He said that it wasn't only he and Faruq in the car. There's Arissa and Raziq too! Oh great damn it! I was real blanked! I do not know what to say. Joshua pulled me to the CCU's level and he showed that Raziq is in there. Then I looked at Joshua's face with 100 of question marks. I wish I could say "SO WHAT?".
Later Joshua showed me that Faruq is doing fine but he's asleep due to the medicine. Ok, fine! I am glad that Faruq is not so badly injured. Except for his broken arm. Then? What's the problem here? I was looking at everybody with nothing's in my mind!
At last, Arissa's mom told me that Arissa is having a phobia or emotional distraction due to the accident and what had happened to Raziq. I was looking right at Aunty Nia's face. I seriously don't understand. Why are they telling me this and why is that everyone is looking at me with that hopping faces? What? What did I do? or what should I do instead?
At last, Joshua came near to me and whispered, "It is only you that can comfort Arissa, and please! For our friendship sake, please do". What? I can't believe what I just heard. All of you are actually begging me to talk to Arissa? To comfort her? TO WHAT? TO WHAT THE HELL?
Hey, come on! I was her ex boyfriend, who she had dumped for that Raziq, and now Raziq is in the CCU, so I have to comfort Arissa? Hey, did you all just lost your mind? I was suffering for like years since she left me, and now.. I have to do that charity work? Is that a charity work or what?? It is not that I hold grudge on Arissa, it is not that I do not want to help her, help them at this critical moment, but come on! What should I say to Arissa? Is it like... "Hi, thanks for dumping me and oh ya! Congrats that your bf had broke his arms and legs, and..." WHAT??
Hey! What's going on? No, I am NOT doing this! I am seriously not going to get involve in this! Joshua was really begging, saying that I can motivate Arissa. Arissa refuse to consume all medications, and now she's crying on the bed and not letting anyone to see her. Uh! Hey guys, I am not a psychologist or a counselor that they can count on to ease all Arissa's sadness. I don't think that she'll ever need me. And what if I am going to fall for her again after the 2 years of working on to get rid of her? Or.. What if Raziq get well very soon, and seeing that I am next to his girlfriend's bed? Oh NO! Never!
I said to them sorry and I left. When I was driving back home, I asked myself! Am I that cruel? Am I the type of keeping grudge? Am I the type of irresponsible? Mom never taught me to be as selfish as this! But... I stopped at the side of the road. I cried. Yes I cried real bad. I am sorry Joshua, it is not that I do not want to help friends who are in trouble, it is not that I am being selfish! But... No one understands me. I called mom from the car. I cried to her and asked her, what to do? What should I do? Mom said come back home, we'll discuss. And...
I came back home few minutes ago. Mom said, I shouldn't get involve if I do not want to. Mom called Aunt Nia and they had some discussions as I called Joshua telling him my sorry. He said he understand and it is okay. Humm.. What a day! What a world!
Sorry Joshua..
Sorry Aunt Nia..
Sorry Arissa...
I just do not want to re-cut my unheal wound.
Please.
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